It's Hubbard time!
For an idea of scale - that's my little size 7 shoe there. Big damn squash we're talking here.
It was a gift from my sister-in-law for our Thanksgiving dinner - she grew a bunch of them in her garden this year. Her advice on opening it was to put it in a trashbag and drop it on a concrete floor. Preferably from a second story window.
Well, I didn't have a second story window, but I had a trashbag and a concrete floor.
Peeking inside the bag, I found no change. Not so much as a dent.
Wrap, heave, drop again.
I tried a couple more times, still with no results. I would have tried lifting it over my head, but it was just too heavy. Finally I bent my knees slightly, then rose up abruptly while throwing the squash into the air. (Picture caber tossing, only with a squash instead of a tree. Same technique.) I managed to get it up about head high, and it hit the ground with a crunchy noise.
I got excited! Success at last!
Nope. But at least I chipped it! Progress!
I launched it a couple more times and got this beautiful crack.
I tried prying it open at this point, but no go. Two more tosses and I opened the bag to this glorious sight:
No squash in the verse can stop me!
I piled the chunks on the table and started hacking off rind.
Finally I took the two biggest chunks left, piled them on a cookie sheet, and threw them in the oven.
And finished peeling the last little piece.
Done. The pot is boiling and the tray is baking, and I'm resting from my mighty labors.
And trying not to think about the fact that my sister-in-law actually gave us TWO of those squashes.
The other one is still waiting for me.
I think I hear it humming the theme from Jaws...